Faces

Putting a face to such a tragic event I feel makes it more personal..makes it real for people. Sometimes unless the tragedy happens in your own life, you find yourself feeling sad but removed. What I have learned through my own conversations with outsiders is that some people still think that suicide only happens to certain groups of people.  The picture of the child above did not fit societies mold of someone who struggled with suicidal thoughts however we are learning more and more that there is no one who is exempt from this. Warning signs are a guide but don't wait to see signs before you ask those questions. So as you read this post about my beautiful, forever 16 year old daughter, I ask you to also think of how you can make a difference from talking to someone about suicide, talking about mental health, or sharing our story which could help someone else. I pray every day that no one else has to face this horror that so many of us face already. This post is all about things that she loved. I want people to see that Sara was an amazing young lady who had the world in her hands. She was loved and adored by many. Her legacy will be to help others find the courage to speak up and the hope to hold steady. 

More things she loved...
She loved air hockey. She would always stick her tongue out as she played. She loved DQ brownies but not the ice cream part. She loved DQ chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream.  She loved to throw darts. She was very good. She love chips with salt. 

She  loved mango chicken from the mall. She loved making monkey bread with nanny. She loved cross words and she was really good at them.  She loved nacho cheese and chips from Taco Bell. She could eat 2 of them. She loved Hersey's kisses. She loved the claw games and would get tons of animals.  She love Anime; Hunter X Hunter and fairytail. She loved RWBY. She loved idol amimes like Aikatsu. She loved to play the game spoons. She loved to tell me "Mom it's chill" She loved to tease her friends endlessly.

She loved webkinz when she was little. We had at least 50 of them.  She loved to play the DS. She has 3 of them and tons of games.  She loved the DS game Fire Emblem. She loved books like the Percy Jackson Series, Hunger games, and anything that was a series. James Patterson was a favorite author. She loved nut crackers at Xmas time and penguins were her favorite of all time. 

She loved lots of board games such as Apples to Apples, Life, Clue and rummy-cube. She loved PANCAKES. She thought Pancake day should be a national holiday. She loved cinnamon crunch bagels from Panera. She liked turning the candles on and off with the remote. She was also a piro when it came to the fire pit. She loved playing with it. She loved Mr. Potato head when she was little.  She loved sock monkeys. She loved the classic Xmas movies like frosty the snowman. She loved butter. She loved cinnamon bread. She loved post it notes. She loved mashed potatoes. She loved magic tree house books when she was a child. She started reading her first books at the age of 3. Sara was a bright child who had the world in her hands but she struggled with anxiety and being perfect. She didn't want to be a burden to those around her by speaking up. If she only knew how much her life kept those around her going. She was our everything. Living without her isn't living most days but I am holding steady. I am holding on to hope to help others. I am set on her legacy not being defined by one moment in her short life but by the people who are impacted by her story. As her mother, I will not give up on trying to help others find there fight. Yes there are days where I feel dead inside but I have reached out to friends and family for help. To help me keep the human connection. The wounds I carry are so deep and raw right now that I am still needing lifted and helped. The first year after losing someone you love is so important to keep the human connection. I am finding my way. Thank you for reading and sharing my story. Thank you for taking a step in breaking the silence and helping remove the stigma from mental illness. 

SPEAK UP!!!!! 

Suicide Prevention Education Awareness for Kids

United as Parents!!!!!!!

There is no immunity to suicide but there is information that offers protection when suicide is seen as an option SO get comfortable knowing your family's mental health and where to get help if or when they need it!